Thursday, May 7, 2009

The Day the World Ended

It was a Saturday. I'm surprised no one noticed when it happened, for we had a Private with detailed inside knowledge prowling the Armory and its grounds with a smug smile upon his countenance.

He shared this knowledge with one and all, singly or in groups, and he caught me unawares as I was toiling at some chore or other: "If you don't see me tomorrow," he began, a beatific smile on his mug, "you'll know what happened. The Lord is calling us home!" He started trying to save my life.

I nodded politely, hoping he would Rapture his ass right then and there and leave his car and wallet behind. No. No, he had to explain that his super-special knowledge was utterly correct, and this took maybe 10 minutes of my life which I shall never have again.

He finally wandered off, trying to save lives. I forgot all about him.

Until the next morning, when he wasn't so smug.

Apparently the world ended--and Gawd didn't want him.

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